Ma Po Tofu Query (some Ala Shanghai pics too)

There is always a lot of discussion flying around abou this area's best pizza, or wings. As I don't really give a crap about pizza or wings, I would like to pose the same question for another dish. I am an enormous fan of Ma Po Tofu. I get cravings for its belly warming tastiness nigh fortnightly and probably consume it once every couple of weeks, having obtained it from a restaurant or having whipped up a homemade batch of dubious quality. Ma Po tofu is a common enough dish and you will find it on most "Chinese" menus, so I don't thing the question is too obscure.

My vote for the best goes to Ala Shanghai. I haven't posted about the place as local writers/bloggers have provided a wealth of opinons/reviews and I haven't felt the need to chime in. This said, I have become a near regular of the place (probably been there 10 or so times). I most recently visited on my darling daughter's second birthday (it seems to be her favorite too, when we drive into the lot she starts yelling, "noodles!").

I actually got Ma Po tofu on the mind due to the fact that I didn't order it at my last visit. Even though the other dishes were delicious,

we had: Spicy Fish Bellies



also: Tong Po Pork (spelling?) The belly of another species. It was a belly kind of night.



my belly was still calling out for the Ma Po.

Francis from "Cooking With Dog" offers a good home solution, and Albany Jane has weighed in on the topic as well. I have had decent results with the Amoy Brand Ma-Po tofu sauce (available at most Asian markets). None of my attempts have matched the taste and texture of Ala Shanghai's offering. So I am wondering, are there any other tofu fans out there? Can anyone direct me to a hidden gem of a restaurant that offers a worthy dish of Ma Po Tofu?

The Burger King Unleashes a Weird New Burger on His Subjects

As usual, my lust for fountain diet cola has resulted in me sampling another fast food abomination. I pulled up to the drive thru at Burger King for a frosty beverage and was quickly seduced by the signage into buying their latest creation, the "Jalapeno and Cheddar BK Stuffed Steakhouse" burger. Say that five times fast. This sounded like a fairly ridiculous concept (the tag line is "in it, not on it"), and even though I have been trying to avoid the "hack food blogger fast food review posts," I felt the need to share my experience.

I always feel that BK's signage and ad design to be slightly less polished (sinister?) then McDonald's. A lot of their food photos are kind of weird in a baroque sort of way. I didn't get a good picture, but there was an ad on a light post heralding their new "Big Breakfast" type platter. It had those strange BK tater tot thingys spilling fourth from a pile of eggs and hotcakes. I was reminded of some sort of larva wriggling on garbage. Not a good mental picture to conjure immediately before eating a squishy hamburger. The picture on the squawk box was of strangely green apple pie, slightly nauseating as well.



A short time later I arrived home with my prize. I kind of like the exploded diagram of a whopper that BK puts on the bag these days, it reminds me of Ikea instructions.



Here you have it, the thing had some nice height and weight.



Opening the wrapper my nostrils were immediately assaulted by a jalapeno-y odor, I took this as a good sign. Better then the usual pickle stink or off-lettuce stink that I tend to be confronted with when eating fast food. Removing the bun we are confronted with a pair of sad tomato slices, some icky wilted lettuce, and a hearty plop of viscous goo (creamy poblano sauce).



I cut the thing in half as I wanted to see the level of "stuffedness."



You can see a couple of flecks of jalapeno and a relatively small amount of melty cheese throughout the thickish patty. I pulled off a bit of the patty to taste it unadulterated by all of the burger accouterment. The first flavor you get is that patented Burger King, dirty grill-esque, fake charred flavor. But you also do get a fairly heavy jalapeno kick. There is actually some spice and heat level to this thing.

I am not endorsing this thing as I think it is a fairly monstrous calorie investment for relatively little culinary joy, but I will say that I find the product encouraging in a way. The throat tickling spiciness, enough to make someone uncomfortable if they are sensitive, is indicative of a willingness by main stream fast food joints to offer more aggressive and assertive flavors. Hints of this have been popping up around the Fast Foodiverse, blue cheese on burgers at Wendy's, real spiciness at Taco Bizzle, spicy nugget sauce at McD's. I think any departure from the icy grip of the vanilla blandness of past mass market food is encouraging, people seem to me demanding real flavor even from fast food.

***BONUS REVIEW!!!!!*******



I forgot to tell you that I got the "Funnel Cake Sticks" too! I hadn't heard about these things, people tell me they have been around for a while. To me, this product exemplifies my idea of ridiculous food. I found them to be irredeemably bad. Greasy, flaccid, mushy sticks of dough with a sickly saccharin dipping sauce. I don't even think my palate as a child would have enjoyed these. These exemplify the "fair food" problem our society has created. Things that may have been enjoyed on a once a month (or once a year!) basis have become nearly daily parts of our life. French fries that might have been a special treat have become a standard side dish, street foods like pizza have become staples. Alas, there is little to be done, and should I really be expecting anything more from the Burger King. My stomach hurts.

100 Bucks!

Huzzah! Google owes me 100 smackers! I never really intended this blog to be a money making enterprise, but I threw a couple ads down at the bottom just to see if anything came of it. I logged into Adsense this morning (I rarely check it) and found that after 3 years I have accumulated the princely sum of 100.05$. I have written about 400 posts, so that is about 25 cents for each of them (probably a fitting price for my drivel).

Anyways, I am looking to reinvest this money back into the local community. I have a couple ideas already, so we shall see...

Four Lickles and Yahtzee

Some friends and I got together on Saturday eve to throw back a few adult beverages and to engage in heated Yahtzee death matches. I decided that this was an opportune time to inflict my Four Lickles on some willing (sort of) test subjects. If you haven't been keeping up, here is a frightening picture of the red and briny bastards.



I cracked open the jar in my hosts kitchen and within seconds the entire ground level of the house was filled with watermelon pickle stink. The smell spread quickly, I was reminded of mustard gas or some other vile implement of war.

I boldly began the testing phase by fishing out a Four Lickle and breaking it in half to get a looksy at the level of Four Loko/Food Coloring penetration.



As you can see the red Four Loko brine penetrated almost to the pickly core, implying that the creations would be fill of watermeloney, caffeine-y, boozy flavor. My merry band of compatriots each steeled their bellies, girded their respective loins, and fished out a worthy pickle. Here is a friend of mine bravely wielding his chosen prize.

Imagine sucking two or three watermelon Jolly Ranchers and then going to town on a gherkin and you will have a pretty good grasp of the Four Lickle experience. It was a slightly interesting blend of tart/fruit/sour/sweet/salt flavors, not altogether pleasant, but also not entirely vomitous. Being undeterred by the relative failure of the Four Lickles proper, we lined up a round of brine shots.



Proof of our courage, as if you needed it.



And that my friends, is that. The end of the Four Loko Pickle odyssey. Sort of anticlimactic as most of my experiments tend to be. I do have an idea that mayhaps will save the whole deal, does Four Loko Pickle relish sound pretty good to anyone? Anyone..?...

The Mr. Dave Dog (My Semi Original Creation)

Lest you think I am being completely original here, let me start off by giving credit where credit is due. For this particular creation, I was inspired by the Ditch Dog of the Ditch Plains restaurant in NY. They do a hot dog covered in macaroni and cheese which seems to me to be a wonderful idea. So when I had tons of leftovers from my latest project (Capital Region Style Hot Dog Chili Mac Cheese), I thought I might try my hand at some hot dog wizardry.

I ventured out into the miserable weather (fist shake at the Upstate NY weather gods) and wrangled up a couple Stewart's Deli Dogs



I got one dog with sauce, one sans. Although there is hot dog chili inside the mac cheese, I thought a little extra might not be out of place.



I spooned on a hearty amount of the Hot Dog Chili Macaroni and Cheese onto both of the dogs and then finished with a dash of bread crumbs.



Macaroni and Cheese and hot dogs are a marriage made in heaven, this has been known for centuries. We have only further proof here with this creation which I have decided to adopt as my own personnel hot dog style, The Mr. Dave Dog (I also have a sandwich, The Hungry David).

The Deli Dog with the extra chili on it was better. It served as glue to hold the mac cheese on and also added next level hot dog chili flavor. Just looky here, as if you need further convincing that this gut wrenching little bastard was delicious.



That is all for now. By the way, I haven't forgotten about the Four Lickles. I am simply waiting for a suitable gathering of associates for a taste test so that I can get a varied cross section of opinions.

I Declare That I Have Invented the Capital Region Style Mac Cheese! (Hot Dog Chili Maccaroni and Cheese)

What happens when a pound of good ol' Upstate New York aged cheddar,



meets with a bottle of Capital Region Style Hot Dog Chili,



inside a tray of fairly vanilla mac cheese?



I declare that Capital Region Style Mac Cheese is created! Huzzah!



The idea for adding Hot Dog chili to baked maccaroni and cheese came to mind as I was discussing the infamous Chili Mac of Army DFAC fame with a buddy. Anyone who has thrown on the old green pajamas for any amount of time will be familiar with this chow hall staple (I think they still even make it in MRE form). Anyhow, I thought that putting the hot dog chili straight onto noodles might be a little plain, so I went with the mac cheese concept.

I started with my usual, fairly standard, bechamel + cheddar maccaroni and cheese recipe (i.e. not that different from what you might find on the back of a Ronzoni box). I don't really have too many secrets to making mac cheese. I do cook the roux a little more than many might (it adds a pleasing nuttiness), and I always add about this much dried mustard powder-



I find that dried mustard is a very crucial ingredient and I was a little heavy handed with my dosage this time to play to the Captial Region dinky dog theme. I kind of folded the jar of Charlie's sauce into the pan of noodles as I was going for veins of chili throughout the dish. I thought that throwing it straight into the bechamel might make for an unappetizing color and appearance.

I topped with more shredded cheese before baking.




Does anyone else, when shredding cheese, decide that the little nub that is left at the end (when you have come to the point where you are worried about shredding your knuckles) is the angels share and should be immediately consumed?



Anyways, the whole mess went into a 375 oven for about 39 minutes. It came out a little less brown and crunchy than I am accustomed to, I attribute this to the added moisture from the hot dog chili. Notice the pools of red grease (nectar of the the hot dog gods which our forefathers worshiped in strange ceremonies behind closed doors), so characteristic of Hot Dog Charlie's particular sauce.



With bated breath I dug out a corner spoonful (my favorite) and threw it on a plate.



Folks, this was very, very tasty. The Greek spice profile of the Hot Dog Charlie's sauce seems to be accentuated in this application. The Capital Region Hot Dog Chili Mac Cheese has a kind of Pasticho feel to it. You get a vinegar tang with a punch of onion that perfectly accentuates the sharpness of the aged cheddar. I would make this again, and I think that you should try it too. Mayhaps this dish will be my legacy, a gift to the future.

By the way, just wait until you see what I plan on doing with the leftovers. Mu. Ha. Ha.

Exploitation of Regional Cuisine at Walfart's

I was at Walmart the other day getting an oil change. I like the idea of dropping off the car and then, for a half of an hour, walking around the bizzarre mecca of American consumerism that is Walmart. I usually don't buy much, but as you know, I find endless amusement in the strange and horrible ways we have come to market, manufacture, and package our chosen forms of sustenance. Ambling by the little sausage/cheese island I found some eyebrow raising items amongst the usual Hickory Farms crap.

First we have the above cheeses, proudly emblazoned with the ol' Stars and Bars, a Union Jack, and the Irish flag (I don't have a snappy nickname for Ireland's flag). There are "Irish" and "English" style cheddars, the American one just says mild cheddar. I inspected the labels and, quite unsurprisingly, all of the selections are processed cheeses. I started to ponder the question of what additive or flavoring they are using which makes one processed cheese food "Irish" style and another "English" style. I am picturing Chinese factory workers pouring giant buckets of liquid labeled "Artificial Irish Cheese Flavoring" into swirling vats of cheese goo.

Next we have some charcuterie (using this word in its loosest form), which is a subject that is very close to my heart (maybe even closer than cheese).



Pictured above is Veneto, Liguria, and Tuscana style "salami" produced by Danielle Inc. (a massive meat co. which recently recalled about a million pounds of product due to salmonella). Despite the differing regional names, all three "salamis" looked pretty similar to me, so I checked the label.



All three had the exact same ingredients, with exception that the darker one had some "artificial smoke flavoring." Now I know that the ingredient list for many varieties of salume are fairly similar, the nuances being dictated by regional ingredients/methods, but I have a sneaking suspicion that this stuff is made using the same salami sludge molded and died into slightly different forms. I would hazard that this product line is very much along the lines of a Hickory Farms type summer sausage which has been jazzed up a little and given some fancy names.



It just strikes me as funny (not funny haha, funny sad) when food corps. take some poor region, steal its local food tradition, slap the label on some processed monstrosity, and then out compete the local producers. Imagine if Walfart's started peddling jars of "Albany Style Hot Dog Sauce (here is my recipe if you happen to be an outlander)." That would get your knickers all bunched up in your neather regions, wouldn't it? I think so.

Emergency Snow Preparedness

I'm ready.

The Double Brown Sandwich. Mr. Dave's Unoriginal Homage to the Obvious.

After imbibing 2 or 3 adult beverages over the course of my Saturday evening, I woke up with an especial jones for greasy food. I am by no means a regular McDonald's consumer (you can read about my first Big Mac here) and it struck me that I haven't actually sat down in one of the joints since childhood. I decided that it was time to reconnect to the golden arches. I get strange masochistic urges to punish my gut on Sunday morns, don't ask me why. Today one of my little ideas struck me while I was ordering.

What do you call the bastard child of 2 hash browns and 1 egg McMuffin? I call it the "Double Brown." This may not be the first go of this concept, if you are the true inventor, come forward.



The whole KFC Double Down thing went down during one of my myriad blogger hiatuses, so I spared you all my own brand of commentary. I am sure the plethora of imitations/discussions/bad jokes that hit the internets was enough for you. So this is my delayed contribution, a sort of breakfast version of the Double Down.



Aside from being kind of a bad and obvious joke, the Double Brown wasn't half bad. Your fingers get a little greasy, but it is a suitable way to inject a hearty amount of fat and carbs into your gut. I think you should try one.

The Interesting Burgers of Deleware Ave.

After hearing many good things, I went over to the Wine & Diner on Deleware Ave. for a little dinner



I apologize for the shoddy photography, but lately I am of the mind that it is sort of rude to spend a nice dinner at a new place snapping away pictures and whatnot. Hence I haven't been doing too many restaurant "review" type posts. A food critic I am not. I do sometimes find that I have the urge to share when I locate an especially interesting menu item.

First we have the "Macaroni and Cheese Burger," photographed here at my house cold, and in leftover form. The burger title is pretty straight forward, i.e. it is a burger. With macaroni and cheese.



The W. & D. did a very good job with this sandwich. Nice toasty bun, cooked medium rare as I requested, and topped with flavorful mac cheese. However, I will still say that you have to cross the Normanskill for the penultimate ridiculous burger offered on Deleware Ave. You will remember the "Deep Fried Buffalo Burger" I told you about from Swifty's in Delmar. Here is a picture to refresh your memory (although some of you may have never forgotten).



Anyhow, the second menu item of note that caught my fancy was the fried Brie appetizer (I shamelessly shot this photo after having consumed a piggish portion all by myself).



You get three large wedges of fried brie served over a balsamic reduction. For the 8 or 9 bucks they were charging, I was astounded by the large amount of brie served. I would have been satisfied with a single wedge. I thoroughly enjoyed this appetizer, my only critique would be that it might not be out of place to serve a cracker/crostini/bread item as an accompaniment (you get the fried cheese, reduction, and a plate). Luckily, I had also ordered a hummus (very good as well) appetizer, so I used some of the tasty pitas from that to scoop up melty fried cheese.

I am kind of excited about the W. & D. I appreciated the whimsical and varied scope of the menu, the decor was nice, the service friendly, you can get a drink, and to top it all off, while not being necessarily a "family" restaurant per se, they seem to be pretty toddler friendly. I didn't get any death stares about the ol' Giblet monster and they have a children's menu. I look forward to subsequent visits. I saw a hanger steak w/chimichurri that I wouldn't mind trying, also a bunch of interesting vegetarian options (dal and some sort of harissa veg medley). Give it a whirl, the place is very reasonably priced to boot.