Saturday, March 14, 2009
The Bible Bar!
I picked up this little gem at the Center for Natural Wellness in 20 Mall out in Guilderland.
It is the Bible Bar, advertising proudly, "Contains the 7 foods of Deuteronomy 8:8". I was at the Center for Natural Wellness picking up some fenugreek capsules for the wife. She claims that fenugreek stimulates the production of breast milk, so Giblet (the daughter) should be pleased. I saw the Bible Bar as I was leaving the store and had to pick it up, biblical health food is a gimmick that I have not checked out yet.
I am not overly religious or very well versed in the bible so I did not really know what they meant by the "7 foods of Deuteronomy." Luckily, I discovered that the back of the package contained the passage-
"A land of wheat, and barley and vines, and fig trees, and pomegranates; a land of olive oil and honey."
So I guess the Bible bar includes all of these mentioned foods, i.e. wheat, barley, raisins (the vine), honey, figs, pomegranates, and olive oil (along with a little holy brown rice syrup and blessed raspberry fruit powder).
I ripped open the holy cellophane shroud that contained my Deuteronomy bar hoping for some real holy land flavor. It was brown and wrinkly as if composed primarily of raisins. I studied the bar carefully for the faces of Jesus or Mary in hopes that I could sell it on ebay, but I couldn't find any miraculous images so I bit in. The Bible Bar was a pretty standard fruit/granola type bar that you might have had previously. No "revelations" here (haha, have I worked the biblical puns to death yet?).
Anyhow, I like the Center for Natural Wellness. They have a nice little selection of healthful, all-natural foods and a very expansive selection of supplements and vitamins. It has not appeared to me the last few times that I have been in that the Center is doing very brisk business. Next time you are off to GNC for your latest herbal miracle maybe give a thought to this place. I always like to support independent merchants, not to beat on the whole "support local businesses" drum. Just a thought.